Have you ever read a self help book? Maybe more than one? Perhaps even devoured anything and everything you can get your hands on. Reading stories, theories and practices on how to focus on the positive regardless of the feeling state you are in. The words of the book inspiring and encouraging you to turn your life around. A few weeks later you find yourself searching for another book that may deliver another message and words of wisdom to allow you truly to see the glass half full and change the way you feel. Did this practice ever leave you feeling frustrated? Annoyed? Maybe even angry because reality is such that sometimes we do not feel so good and to focus on happy thoughts in that moment seems such a chore, doesn't it? How can that be, when everybody seems to preach to focus on the positive? How do we as human beings exclude that which we are feeling?
I am here to incite you to embrace your emotions...ALL of them. There is a world of negative emotions out there and while they are accompanied by some discomfort, they are designed to make you feel better in the long run. They are crucial, otherwise they would not exist!
We have always been emotional beings first. During our first years of life we literally are what we feel. Our emotions, are the only tool we have to communicate to others what we need. Our emotions and the expression of them, help us achieve our end result; a baby crying for food,for attention or simply for a diaper change.
It is only human to yearn for happiness and dwell on that yearning. Happiness is a worthy individual goal; however I conclude that socially and culturally there is a sense that anything BUT positive and happy is taboo. Anger, frustration, sadness and the expression thereof has become unacceptable and a nuisance. Reality is that we can not all live like Buddha, Jesus, Yogananda, ... and that is ok. An excessive focus on ones own happiness and judgement of the lack thereof, minimizes emotions that are equally important albeit less fun.
The experiencing of these emotions assists us in finding out what we do want, in detail. You may have heard the analogy of the contrast of light and dark. It is only the contrast of them that makes us aware what the other is and allows us to differentiate between them. When walking into a room at night without any light, you wouldn't walk in and pretend that you can actually see and that there is light in the room. You just walk in and notice it.
Allow all emotions to be a part of your story, notice them, acknowledge them and feel the contrast to which they are guiding you to. Instead we suppress them, medicate them, ignore them, numb them. Allow these emotions to assist you in writing your life story even more clearly, chapter by chapter, discovering what it is specifically, with much detail, that makes your light go on. Knowing how to better channel and accept these emotions allows you to better live with yourselves and others.
Instead of choosing to see the glass half empty or half full, how about we choose to see the glass in its entirety and let that be enough. Focusing on the present in itself will be sufficient. I challenge you to try... you will notice emotions identify opportunities for change and provide feedback and clarity in what you do want.
Would any human being ever have been successful if failure wasn't a part of the experience?